I recently heard someone answer the question: “What is misery?” They answered that misery to them was being in a hospital waiting room with the AC blasting. I thought how very true! Obviously, this person has spent time caring for someone.
There are so many little things they don’t tell you about the hospital waiting room experience. I was not prepared for the night before sleeplessness, the inability to eat, my stomach going into mutiny, or the anxiety. And my dad or mom were usually the ones having the operation or procedure!
They keep the hospital so cold most of the time (I’ve been told to keep the germs down) and although the staff is usually wonderful and kind they are very matter-of-fact about everything which made me want to scream!! Didn’t they know my dad was going to have open-heart surgery at the age of 87? Why weren’t they as freaked out as I was?
And as good as the administration offices were and as careful as I was there was always a little glitch somewhere about something. No, they didn’t get the list of his current meds I faxed, no, they need all his paperwork again and on and on.
So to ease the stress and discomfort of the waiting room and the hospital process, I found ways to help brighten the hospital waiting room experience, and would love to share them with you.
- A good sense of humor!
The best tool I had in my toolbox was my sense of humor. I followed in my Dad’s footsteps and tried to get a laugh out of the administrators, nurses, and doctors. It is the only way to manage the experience. It helps to move everything along and ease the general atmosphere around a very uncomfortable situation. It also helps me to stop taking myself so seriously and makes me calm down.
- Go easy!
Going in like gangbusters does absolutely nothing to help the situation and can make our time in the ER more uncomfortable. I’ve been known to be overly aggressive or intense without meaning to and have made everyone around me defensive and want to avoid me. Taking a breath (so much of caregiving is about breathing!) trying to smile and slowing down helps everyone involved relax. You want the staff to be happy to help you. Make it easy for them to feel that way.
- ER Survival bag
You should always have a little bag packed with things to make your wait as comfortable as possible. Keep it by the door of your home in case your loved ones need to be rushed somewhere. My bag had a sweatshirt hoodie, tissues, my phone, phone charger, water, snacks, Power Bars, favorite magazines, an iPad or laptop or tablet with music, games, and any reading material I liked on it. Ask for the WiFi password and watch cat videos. This bag also contains any current reports, medical tests, a list of all medications, and health insurance paperwork. Add anything else that floats your boat and makes things easier.
- Don’t be embarrassed if you are upset.
I found even when I was trying to keep my sense of humor that I was prone to start crying sometimes. I just worried so much and cared so much that I could get weepy. I tried not to let my loved ones see it but I most certainly stopped trying to hide it from the hospital staff. It made me more human to them and they went out of their way to be kind. My emotional display touched a chord for them quite often because they too have loved ones and know what it’s like to worry about them.
The bottom line is, relieve the misery of the waiting room any way you can. You deserve to have the best experience possible in this stressful situation. It’s never going to be a picnic but it can be a much more relaxed, calm, and comfortable situation. Good luck and God bless!
If you liked this blog, you will love this one!
Holidays in the Hospital
Dear Caregiver Warriors,
As one Caregiver Warrior to another, I offer advice, helpful tips, and strategies based on the experience, strength, and hope I found while surviving my own caregiving journey. It has become my mission to share my stories and the things I learned about being an empowered caregiver. To help spread the word and offer guidance to other caregivers, I have written a new book entitled “Self Care for Caregivers: a practical guide to caring for you while you care for your loved one.” It’s available at your favorite bookstore. There is even a audio version so you can listen on the go! If you find the book everything you hoped for, please let me know and please leave a review where you purchased the book! Your feedback means the world to me!
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